JUDGE

RATING

COMMENTS

 06-Alex Calvo

8

 Jeremy, don't I know you from somewhere? ;)

You know I love this song. However, the keyboard solo always seemed a little out of place to me (like it doesn't quite go)...

It's a winner!

09-Robert Field

7.5

Great vocal expression. I thought the drums could've been brought up a little in the mix.

03-Joe Huettner

8

Very good chord progression, and excellent production. Make sure you pronounce your consonants. Cool tempo change from half to double time. I like the organ solo, but the rhythm section should be more rockin' at that part, in my opinion. Just a simple, lightly overdriven guitar would help that. Also, maybe go back into the chorus after the solo. But anyway, good work! Excellent, this will definitely be near the top.

92-Bobbio

8.5

Cool idea using the "churchy" sound....with that title.Loved the melody at "is all she ever brings" and how the title is used with the same.....makes the song....Kinda reminds me of The Wondermints...(Brian Wilson's favorite band)...however....couldn't understand the words alot of the time...the lyrics confused me...I got the general idea, but needed a little more to fully understand. The organ break was as cool as it gets...a big surprise...but...wanted you to come back singing again instead of fading out....good work.

05-David Tallent

8.75

As for lyrics, difficult subject handled very well. Singing was superb. Organ solo seemed out of place to me (you know us guitar guys, I'd rather have heard a good shread solo). A great number with much potential.

91-Christina

6

Pretty good song overall. Poor diction or perhaps too much reverb sort of kill it. Good, though not very memorable pop tune and harmonies. What's with the interference? It sounds like a faint radio station butting in. If it was done on purpose it's really not well inspired.

95-gogofantastik

8

-exemplar pop song - recalls, to me, chicago, elton john, phil collins... well sung, though i agree with comments about 'muddiness' of production...

-though "piety and greed" works (in terms of singability and phonics, etc.) in the chorus, i'd think about maybe using a different title - there's something a bit off-putting (to me) about it - what, ok, what is it... sounds a little archaic, maybe? now that i think about it, i'm not sure that the story as told in the verses helps to explain *why* "it's all piety and greed"... this may be clear to someone who's experienced a divorce, and enough to evoke the associations you're making, but not to me, anyway...

notwithstanding that one quibble, this is a well-planned, well-developed song that is internally cohesive (viz structure.)

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wanted to explain further what i wrote in my critique ...

the verses, to me, paint a picture of two people who are now strangers in their marriage, whose passion is lost to the routine everydayness of working a less-than fulfilling job (male) and of the wife's frustration of feeling trapped at home ... people who will survive, as you said...

piety and greed... ok, i guess i get it - the husband's view of the wife - a martyr (piety) - the wife's view of the husband - a selfish money-hungry jerk (greed) - or is it that you're saying that they objectively embody piety and greed - that the narrator is judging them to be equally self-serving?

i hope not, because you've managed to capture the sublety of the characters' experience in the verses - which to me, explain their frustration as a function of larger societal impositions... i think the chorus' pronouncements on the characters does a disservice to the good work done in the verses...

07-Nancy G. Brundrett

9

This is a really great song to me. It reaches into my heart and that is good! Your lyrics are excellent. Your sound
reminds me of "Tears for Fear".. great vocals and great
production also.

Thank you for blessing me with your music,

Nancy G

01-Lee Alexander

8.25

This song was extremely well done. The melody was catchy. Only downside is there were too much effects on the vocals making the lyrics hard to understand. You have a great voice, you don't need to dress it up so much.

12-Hazelglow

6.5

I had to look piety up in the dictionary. [Which perhaps says more about me than it does about you!] Is all that radio station snippets business meant to be in there? Why? The change in feel/rhythm of the instrumental sections sounds incongruous against the feel of the rest of the song, then sounds even more disjointed when bolted onto the piano section at the end (which is actually really beautiful in itself). I think overall a few too many disparate feels/ideas which end up confusing poor old me. Keep the piano theme, use it more often, and ditch some of the other radical style changes. I'm a little confused where the peak/high is meant to be in this song, 'cos there's quite a few of those too (again, different each time). Really nice voice for this sort of material!

11-Joro

6.75

I enjoyed your music tremendously...
very cool tunage however, one aspect of songwriting that I try to stick to is to never use words that are not common to an everyday conversation. Piety would be one of these words...on the other hand....your chorus is outstanding...
but the hook isn't there...or perhaps I am confusing verse with chorus...
The following quote is great writing...really good stuff man...


"People seem to keep walking in and out of my life
I'm still not strong enough to be able to put up a fight
If you still want freedom....I'll survive.."


Sorry if I got it wrong...
I had a very hard time understanding the lyric...there is way too much verb on your vox.

08-Don Lyman

Couldn't get it to play on my computer. Would play for a couple seconds, then stop, then a couple seconds, then stop, etc. Sorry!